Introduction to Greendale: My Community College Experience

Just because this tale would be nothing without examples, it’s time for me to let you in on a few of my absolute favorite experiences at Greendale. I’m sure plenty of people will have heard the stories, but I can’t resist sharing them all over again. I won’t tell you all my favorites, because there are far too many to list here, but here are five of the best moments.

5. Modern Warfare

Who would have thought that an all-out paintball war would have happened here at Greendale? I mean, I wanted priority registration as much as the next guy, but it was doubtful that I’d win. And then I heard about Britta and Jeff banging and my only thought was, “Knew it.” If only I hadn’t been hiding right in that bathroom stall where they promptly shot me down because they thought I’d betray them all like Pierce had.

4. Advanced Dungeons & Dragons

It’s really hard to describe what went on during this game of Dungeons & Dragons, but it really was one of the most entertaining times I’ve had playing it. I think a lot of it has to do with just how much of a giant dick Pierce is and probably Annie and Abed’s intense sex scene that left me somewhat in shock. PS: I was sitting on the couch listening in on all of this and not actually playing, but nobody noticed I was there.

3. Abed’s Uncontrollable Christmas

I’m still not entirely sure how this happened. We were a stop-motion Christmas special and everything was great. It’s just as much of a winter wonderland as anyone could have ever expected at Greendale. Somehow I got turned into the snow in Abed’s fantasy world (yes, the snow), but at least I could experience this entire magical event firsthand. Let me tell you, it was one of the most touching moments I’d seen happen at this place. And don’t forget the songs.

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